Just coming from the chatroom. The member list shows 16 users...the last lines in room were written 17 minutes ago - and the last six lines consisted of only one or two (in numbers 1 or 2!!!) words.
I know...most of us are in their homeoffices, chatting is a nice way to get distracted from work or to clear brain. I do that too. But i don't think that ALL are busy with other things. And not all are working when they are in chatroom, because they have retired, a day off or simply holidays.
The question is: Why is nobody talking, as the room was built exactly for that purpose? Is it the fact that (as often) we only have male members no one wants to chat with another male member? Maybe all are waiting for a lady to enter - like the phenomenon that only ladies's pics get commented (and if you delete the words nice, sexy, wonderful, most comments were empty...)?
If I dont want to talk, i just leave and try not to park my nick there. At least i set status as not active, but only a few know about that room feature.
Why i make up this post? Well, he result of this behaviour does not support chat: In these moments I know that even a "hello" is a wasted word and i leave without typing anything. That's not polite and is another phenomenon i often watch: People enter, check member list and run without a greeting, but maybe that is connected to an issue i already have mentioned.
So maybe at least a line with a complete sentence would be nice. Internet is fast, digitalization even faster, but there should be the time to write a complete sentence. So all who enter the room see that there is a chat room filled with living people and not lurkers waiting for what i dont want to know.
My Wall
Beyond the LVE’s that are in the chat room for other purposes, I think the lack of conversation is because many members only want shallow, pseudo friendships. They are content to engage in trifling “conversations” of “hi”, “how’s it going”, or “what’s your weather like”. It is analogous to meeting someone on the street and asking “How are you?” -- no one really expects more than a one word response like “fine”, “ok” or “great”. I know I might be uneasy if someone really started telling me about their problems.
I have intentionally tried to raise [slightly] deeper topics for discussion, designed to reveal a bit more about the persons on the other side of the screen. Thoughtful answers to deeper questions forge real friendship through common interests and shared experiences. In all honesty, it is hard work and takes precious time to truly engage this way. Perhaps the very nature of an open-forum chat room promotes the very frivolity you and I rail against. I have asked the question to JN if additional rooms (topic focused? limited number of participants? other qualifiers?) might be created ad hoc. It appears the room technology would support it but there are likely underlying issues that prevent it (e.g., server capacity or licensing).
For one-on-one discussions there is always private chat or JN Messenger, but these can lose the intellectual stimulation inherent in three or more contributing to a topic. Therefore, I find myself drawn toward the forums, blogs and wall posts. These avenues are more asynchronous than “chat” (well, assuming your chat is responded to) but can lead to more insightful interactions. For myself, I will continue to drop in on the chat room occasionally; but, with very limited expectation of meaningful engagement.
And so, I stop my rant now.
How’s your weather?Thanks for the blog, Stefan. I want to add some personal insights that expand on some of your ideas. Unfortunately, as with any free-to-join nude site, there will always be lurkers, voyeurs and exhibi...See more